I Am The Ocean - Puked On And Slapped Up

Greetings.
I wrote you a letter.
And, well, since you asked nicely I guess I'll let you keep it.
It's chalk-full-to-the-brim with 100%, top-notch, Grade-A, American handwriting... and it's got all the right criteria to make one of those good letters, I (and we) assure you of that.
But, sometimes you can only understand just what's being said, only (actually) when you hear it.. hear it out-loud.
And with that (being said)

Dear you........