Jon Lajoie - I Kill People

(Did you miss me?)

(Oh yeah)
(What what MC Vagina's right back in this bitch)
(2009 is the year that I recorded this song
still not loving police
still got love for the vaginal crease)
(Player haters beware because...)

Guns don't kill people... uh uh
I kill people... with guns pow
Guns don't kill people... uh uh
I kill people... with guns

Hey punk-ass gangsters what you lookin' at
You think you can front with me you better watch your back
Because I have a lot of guns and I can shoot them good
I'm a menace from society a boy on the hood

I'm invincible like Bruce Willis in the movie Invincible
I'm invisible like ...well I'm not really invisible
I'm bad like the movie Attack of the Clones
I'm dangerous (dangerous) like a fire in a nursing home

Old people burning old people burning put your hands up
Old people burning old people burning that's kind of messed up
What, what you got a problem with this?
Maybe I should kick you in the face with my fist

Because on top of guns I know karate and ninja stuff
So if you come at me I'll trip you then I'll suck your nuts
I... I mean you know punch your nuts
Sucking them would be gay and I'm totally not gay
I'm all about V A G I N A (what)

Guns don't kill people... uh uh
I kill people... with guns
pow
Guns don't kill people... uh uh
I kill people... with guns

If a guy messes with me I shoot him with my load All over his chest and face and down his throat
Cause I don't give a fuck I'm crazy like Mel Gibson
No wait that just makes me sound racist

Listen, I buy a lot of expensive things because I have a lot of money
You can't afford expensive things cause you don't have a lot of money
Ha ha you want these things but you cannot afford them
That means that you're not cool cause you're just a poor person

Stupid poor people stupid poor people
I have more money than you
Stupid poor people stupid poor people
You can't even afford food

When I show'em my money
They want to have sex with me
And they always have orgasms
Cause my penis is so big

25 inches long and 12 inches thick
I'm the Anthony Hopkins of cock, the Albert Einstein of dick
I'm The Beatles of cumshots, the Mozart of huge balls
The Ann Frank of erections... no that's inappropriate

Everybody knows that my rhythms are really tight
Like an extra-large condom on my penis that's right
My lyrics are like the movie The Shawshank Redemption
...They're really good

Guns don't kill people... uh uh
I kill people... with guns
Guns don't kill people... uh uh
I kill people... with guns

I've killed so many people that I don't even remember how many people I've killed
But it's probably around... 7... thousand
2005 plus 4 pennies
Representing the North side
C to the ANADA, bitch

Oh yeah, women are actually good for four things
Cooking, cleaning, vaginas... and their sisters' vaginas