Sickening Horror - This Cold Funeral

As I watch the darkest pages of what seems
to be the so-called diary of my mind's reflections
the only relief is I'm turning breathless
to walk by the seashore of self-rejection

This cold funeral - Revel inside
My cold funeral - Vanishing light

Sudden loss of something I never owned
but still consider it as one of my personal belongings
Obliged to welcome the strange guest I've always disliked
in this feast of illusions

This cold funeral - Revel inside
My cold funeral - Vanishing light
Conceive the ending
Conceive the potential of nothingness
Everything's said and everything's wasted
It's like a virus, can you feel this?
Everything's been incinerated
It's something absent, you can't kill this
Everything tastes like desparate dreaming
You're left outside a frame that's bleeding
Everything's more than anything counted
You're shallow inside to conceive it

Finally I understand the poem which seemed to me weird

Everything's said and wasted and everything's wasted
It's like a virus, can you feel this?
Everything's been incinerated
It's something absent, you can't kill this

It's like a virus, it's something abscent
You're shallow inside to conceive it