The Carrier - Wash Away My Sins

For the first time, you can see a side of me that you've never seen It hides behind this mask I fake, but I hope that you can't see the real me I've tried to dream my life away, in hopes of forgetting yesterday But it's when no one is awake, that my mind plays tricks on me I'm drowning myself in excuses for my actions I'm trying to make sense of all of my bad habits I'm carefully miscalculating my next mistake, predicted disregard of planning any future for me Can someone please remind me of a different way to live? Before tonight fades away, I'll have dug my own grave I'm becoming more deaf to heartbroken reports of youth Disillusioned too, we can pretend like we never knew Of better days, a life without hate, where everything is new Where the struggle of getting through the day is something I never knew I can't even recall a time, or remember when in my life I wasn't worried about doing what's wrong or doing what's right My mind still screams at me, while my body bleeds As I try to wash away my sins from this life I lead Right before the night slowly slips away And I get my chance to escape I'm constantly reminded of all my failures, my defeats And the only nightmare I have is living Dreaming my life away, forgetting yesterday I'm becoming more deaf to heartbroken reports of youth Disillusioned too, we can pretend like we never knew Of better days, a life without hate where everything is new Where the struggle of getting through the day was something I never knew